Black Female Problems 

I know some people don’t mean any harm, but c’mon… 

Allow this writer to deviate for just a moment. There was a picture floating around of me (not anymore now that I had it removed) where I had allowed my hair to grow really long. I had my hair blown out and flat ironed straight. Every single time this writer allows her hair to grow really long and straightens it, I have to hear or read such shameful back handed comments such as:

Omgosh she’s so cute to be Black.

You’re so pretty for a Black girl.

I’m not really attracted to Black women, but you’re beautiful. 

That’s not her hair, it’s a weave!

If her hair is really that long, she’s got to be mixed. 

Stop saying she’s Black, she’s obviously half Dominican. Black women don’t look like that. 

As a Black woman, comments like that are not amusing whatsoever. Statements like that insinuates that Black women can’t be pretty and that only mixed Black women can be attractive. Not only that, to assume that my hair is a weave or that my hair only grows long because people assume I’m mixed also insinuates that Black women can’t grow long hair. Take it from this writer, when you give a compliment leave race out of it. There’s beauty in all of us and that is an undeniable fact. 

Until next time…keep on writing! 

Rise Over Racism 

Not too long ago, I made a post entitled Does My Melanin Offend You. In that post, I discussed my own experiences with racism and prejudice. I was asked by a few readers if I would post about some of my past experiences with racism and / or prejudice in the workplace. Without going into too much detail, I will list a few of my experiences below. 

1. I was called the N-word. This was not said directly to me, but to other people who were so upset by it that they felt compelled to tell me. I think almost every Black person has experienced this either directly or indirectly. 

2. I have had coworkers go to a number of lengths to get me fired. Although I have never been fired, I did end up getting wrote up once for something I did not do because of a lie they told on me. 

3. I have had coworkers ignore me due to my race. It was later said that they had an issue with me, a Black woman, giving them directions or instructions. 

4. I was called a narrow nosed, nappy headed mutt due to my African and Native American ancestry. 

Racism and prejudice in my opinion is a mental disease. To dislike someone based on the color of their skin is absolutely ridiculous in my opinion. Yet, I do not allow such negative feelings, opinions or views to rob me of my happiness or to affect my self esteem. At the end of the day, what “I” answer to is what really matters. 

Those people do not pay my bills nor do they have any say so regarding who am I and what I choose to do. I am sure it bothers them to see someone like me continue to smile and be happy regardless of the things they say or do. So if any of you are experiencing racism or prejudice due to your skin color, rise above it and keep being you. Stay positive and do not allow such hateful behavior to rob you of your inner peace and joy. 

Whether you are Black, White, Hispanic, Middle Eastern, Asian, Biracial or a mixture of multiple races, be happy with who you are and never allow the negative opinions of others to dictate your happiness or your self worth. Rise above it and move on. 

One Love! 

Until next time… 

Does My Melanin Offend You? 

As a woman of color, I have had my share of racism and prejudices. It comes with the territory I guess of being Black. Many people today still feel and share the belief that Black people are unequal, uneducated and of a lower class. It has been said many times that cooking in the kitchen or cleaning up after folks is what Black people do best. Doing anything other than that or better than that poses a threat towards those with such warped beliefs. For some, it is almost too much for them to see another Black person do well, let alone better than them. For others, that connotation is simply unbelievable. 

Time and time again I have had to listen to my family and close friends vent about how they are treated at their places of employment. Some of it is subtle racism and some of it is not. There were times when my mouth was left open after hearing some of the things they went through because I could not fathom some of the things they were telling me. It is enough to make you angry and it is enough to break your heart. 

My subtle encounters with racism and prejudice usually happens when people find out “smart” or knowledgeable I am when it comes to a lot of things. I am sure at first glance I am seen as a small Black woman with not much to offer. As soon as they realize I am a far cry from what they once believed, that is when I begin to encounter such issues at my places of employment. I have not had a job yet where this did not happen to me. Needless to say, I never pay them any mind because a lot of it is due to insecurity issues and of course, hate. 

My melanin is what makes me stand out and my melanin is what makes me unique. Why should I apologize for being educated, motivated and Black? If my melanin offends you, I hate it for you. My cocoa butter brown skin is not going anywhere. It will continue to be radiant and glisten in the sunlight. If that offends you, oh well you will be alright. I will continue to block you out like I have done all the rest. Being the better person is what I do best! 

Until next time…